Mode of annoying the human - on!

In my jewelry forum, Starving Jewelry Artists, there's always a daily topic that does not necessarily have to do with jewelry, just to get to know each other better. Yesterday the topic was pets and how they annoy you sometimes. First I was afraid to answer because I thought I might never be able to stop again. Oh yes, as much as I love the furry beasts, I regularly threaten to sell them. I'm not sure if I interpret their looks right, but to me it looks like "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn". I shouldn't quote movies that much around them, they only use it against me.

But what do they do to annoy me most? Let's see.

- Meffi and Greebo are "lickers". One of this days I'll post a picture of me, but I won't have a nose and I won't have arms, only bones sticking out because they licked all flesh off me. Oh, I forgot, I also won't have hair as Greebo does his best to eat it whenever he gets a chance. Don't worry about them, it's not a sign of malnutrition, I had that checked. They are just weird.


- Esme and her "five minutes". Besides the fact that she can't stand me whistling - which earned her a blog post already if you remember - she thinks she's allowed to annoy me with her squeaking. If stupid human Mom doesn't understand right away, she can get so mad that she starts jumping up, aiming for my arm. She doesn't bite, it's more like "Listen to meeeeee". Which I gladly would if I had any idea what she wants. It's usually not food, not playing, not snuggling. What else is there??


- Esme and her behavior when I try to take a photo on the chest of drawers in the tall guy's playroom. LOUD squeaking, jumping me, the chair, the table, the chest. Up, down, up, down, getting louder by the minute. If I take a picture anywhere else, no problem. One opinion about this is: The chest is haunted and she wants to warn me. Ungh.

- Ponder and Esme think my keyboard belongs to them. Have I ever told you that once I thought my monitor was broken because it suddenly was black when I looked up? My only excuse, it was dark and the cat in question that blocked the view is black. And big. And silly. Ponder, who else. I almost got a heart attack when the "black monitor" suddenly moved. They are usually so loud, but also they can materialize in half a second and without the smallest sound.
The other day Ponder had parked his big head on my ctrl-key which I hadn't noticed. I had to use the + and the writing on the screen became bigger and bigger. After being confused for a bit I saw Ponder moving. On the key. He was not amused that I dared to move him then!


- Bedtime. Why is it that Meffi and Ponder always have to use me as a trampoline?? Why does Greebo think my side of the bed belongs to him? I have woken up before with one leg in the bed and the other foot firmly on the floor outside the bed while my cat stretches as if he's going for an entry in the Guinness book as the world's biggest cat.

- T-shirts have to have holes, don't they? The boys love to cling to me with everything they've got. Everything meaning some very sharp claws. They don't want to hurt me, I'm sure, they just want to hold on to me. Greebo is so afraid of losing me that once my dermatologist asked me if I had a bad itch. I said no, why and he pointed out the heavy scratches on my shoulders. His look when I said it was my cat told me everything. I don't even want to know what exactly he thinks I'm into. I have thought about bringing Greebo as proof the next time.


You know I could go on, but just now the big, black, silly cat landed in the hammock. The purring and the adoring look (what actors they all are!) makes me forget all the annoying things for now. I'll just enjoy cuddling with one of the four best cats in my world ;-)