Black nemesis

It's five years today since I had to say goodbye to Ponder.
I'm still struggling so much with that. I hadn't been prepared for it and so wasn't ready for it and he left the biggest hole ever.
It also reminded me that the story of Ponder and Esme moving in here has never been shared before, not on his blog, not on mine, and it felt like this would be the right moment to do that.

Imagine an ordinary Saturday at our little local zoo whose name literally translates to "animal park".
A lady comes down the path to the entrance. She stops me and asks me if we are the "animal home" - that's what we call the shelter. I tell her that people often confuse us, but no, that's not us and as far as I know the shelter isn't open that day.
She makes an impatient sound and informs me she has two black kittens in the car that she needs to drop off immediately. They can't keep them, they are trouble-makers (kittens, now there's a surprise), and she should never have given in to the pleas of her children when her friend's cat had kittens. They already have a grown-up cat and also one of the kittens has been dancing around on the balcony railing (I always thought that must have been Ponder).

To say that I didn't get a good feeling from this would be putting it extremely nicely. Just the thought of a kitten being allowed on a balcony, so it could jump on the railing, made me want to ... well ...
To this day, I'm deeply convinced that she would just have opened the car door on the way home if I hadn't said I wanted to have a look.
By now, the ex had joined me and when I said "black kittens", he just sighed and said, yes, let's have a look.

We got to the car in which her young daughter sat with a sad face, two kittens in her arms.
There was no crate, no blanket, nothing, which just convinced me even more that they would not have made it back home.
A short look to the ex - not that I would have cared even a bit if he had tried to say no - and I gently took them from her. You could tell she tried to be brave, but it was definitely the right choice for me to take them even if she didn't know.

Obviously the first step was to get them both home, this time me sitting in a car with two kittens in my arms one of which was clearly wrigglier than the other. We could have taken a crate from the zoo, but we lived pretty much around the corner and didn't want to confuse them with zoo scents, so the ex dropped me off at home where I put those two in quarantine in the bunny room for now and stayed with them until they fell asleep.

At the time we already had four cats, Gandalf, Merlin, Meffi, and Greebo, and we hadn't planned on two more, but a colleague of mine had asked me some time before if we knew of a kitten for a friend of hers. Maybe that friend would take two?
Let's be honest, I knew I wasn't going to ask her and so did the ex. He had seen my look when I told him they were black. Possibly I drooled a little over the mere thought.
Also I went to the chat of the cat diabetes forum right away and believe me, those ladies didn't encourage me to give them up, either.

At least they weren't sick and not too young, either, probably around ten to twelve weeks, something to be grateful for. Not only didn't they need milk anymore, they also ate like big cats, especially the boy. I have to admit that I don't remember if I named them secretly right away or officially which would already have been a sign they wouldn't go anywhere - named after a wizard and a witch as was tradition in our house.
Ponder was an escape artist even at that age. When someone opened the door to the quarantine room, the little fellow was out like a rocket and jumped right into the big cat crowd to steal their food. They were usually so confused that they didn't even try to put him in his place. Esme followed if you let her, a bit slower, but not less confident. I really wish there were videos of that.
After that had happened several times, the ex gave me a weary look and told me to leave the door open because "we both know they won't be going anywhere".
Believe me, he just played the victim. Just like Meffi, Esme fell in love with him right away which he loved and Ponder was my buddy from the start.

Ponder and Esme both grew to be big cats. When I looked down at them from the floor above, it felt like watching two panthers roam the flat, sometimes it was even a bit spooky which is why I gave them different names, such as "black nemesis". It often made me wonder what their parents looked like.
Ponder was loving and clingy and his loud voice and his nose reminded me of Siamese, Esme could bite for a warning if she hated something (like me taking pictures of things on the "cursed" chest of drawers or daring to whistle), her round head and cute little nose (not flat!) made me think of Persian cats. Ponder had the white spots on chest and belly that black cats often have, Esme was all black.
Ponder loved being picked up and snuggled and I loved to dance with him (sometimes even with him and Greebo at the same time), Esme tolerated it if she was in a good mood, but didn't jump into your arms.
Only after the ex left, she found out that I was a pretty good snuggler and loved falling asleep with her legs curled around my arm, my hand on her belly.

I could tell endless stories about those two, but cat fanatics can get a bit exhausting, I know.
Some of the stories are already on Ponder's blog and maybe there will be more to follow.

Sometimes I think Ponder sent den Dekan to me as a big joke or because he didn't want Gundel and me to get bored, couch potatoes that we are. Esme didn't get to know Gundel because I lost her four years before Ponder, but I remember Ponder and Gundel chasing each other once she had warmed up after getting off the streets. She kept giving him cheeky little slaps on the butt and then turned around and ran, and it looked so funny seeing my big boy running after that small girl, it was even funnier the other way round.

I think it must have been fate that the lady turned up at the zoo on a Saturday when we happened to be there and that I was the first one she ran into.
Ponder and Esme brought something special to the cat gang and I'm glad we didn't miss that.
Sometimes I call Gundel Esme by mistake ... when she falls asleep next to me with her legs around my arm, my hand on her belly.
I miss my gorgeous panthers.